Here we go - the big day is upon us!
THURSDAY, MARCH 6, 2014
Both Hubby and I are pretty annoyed at this point. Between the constant alarms and bells going off from all of my monitors and the steady stream of the doctors and nurses, we were getting NO sleep. I had a new nurse at this point, and she kept telling me to lay on my left side because it was better for the baby.
Now, remember how I mentioned that the doctor told us that if you lay on one side or another, the epidural would trickle down and make that side much more numb? Well, he was right. Very, very right. I had mentioned to my nurse that I wanted to sleep on my back, but she kept telling me the left side was better. Well, about an hour later, my left leg was DEAD. Not able to lift it, not able to move it...nothing. Not that it's a bad thing, but that factors into things in a bit.
At about 5am, the doctor came in to check on my progress and break my water. I wasn't dilated much, but he said that the water breaking would help move things along. I should also take this time to mention that this doctor was young. Like, I was a little worried he was still in med school. Nothing like having a dude that looks like he's 12 staring at your lady business. *sigh* I asked if the process would hurt and he gave me the best response possible: "Well, I've never had it done, but I don't think so." Apparently my lack of sleep was already messing with my head. Of course he wouldn't know. Duh, Mandy!
Water broke and it was probably the most anti-climatic thing to happen. Hubby and I tried to get some more winks in since we figured we would be in there for quite some time. Only a few hours later, we were woken up yet again, and were introduced to the new doctors on the floor for the day. Again, they were all so young! At least this time they were women. ;) They were super nice and let me ask all kinds of dumb questions. I finally asked what the next step was and they told me they were going to stop in to each room and introduce themselves to each of the women on the floor and would be back in about 2 hours to check my progress. No problem. Hubby and I continued to watch the Today Show.
Only about a half hour after that, one of my OB doctors came in to say hello. Hubby and I had seen her a few times at my appointments, so she wanted to come in and say hello. She was the OB Attending for the day, but once she saw my name on the sheet of admitted women, she wanted to drop in. It was so nice to see a familiar face :). I had mentioned to hubby that while I couldn't feel a darn thing past my belly button, I felt like something was happening. He passed that information along to the doctor and asked if she wouldn't mind just doing a super quick exam, which she agreed to immediately. As soon as the exam started, she said "Oh! You're fully dilated. I gotta go get your doctors...let's have a baby!" Once again, I was taken off guard. I guess this was happening!
In between the time it took for Dr. Small to track down the other doctors, the anesthesiologist came in again to check on me. Apparently my epidural wasn't stopping the pain as high on my abdomen as they wanted, so they doubled my meds. I opened my mouth long enough to mention that I was feeling really sick to my stomach when I puked. Hubby barely had enough time to get a basin under my mouth. Now I don't know many people out there who LIKE vomiting, but let me tell you that vomiting when you're feeling major contractions and haven't slept is unlike anything I've ever experienced before. So now on top of everything else, I felt disgusting. Ugh.
Sometime during this entire ordeal, my mom showed up. We had told her to come on down since we thought it was going to be a while before anything happened. She wasn't supposed to be in the room for delivery (hospital rules dictated one adult since they needed room for all the medical staff and we had decided hubby would be there with me.) She was taken by surprise with all the hub bub.
During this time, I didn't talk. I didn't want anyone talking to me. I was concentrating SO HARD on NOT pushing. The contractions were killing me, and even with a dead leg, I could feel burning. I was so pissed that I couldn't just tap out and hand this over to someone else to do for me. I was super annoyed that no doctors were in there with me, and I was completely mystified as to why I was feeling so much after having this darn epidural. What the heck was going on?! Where the hell was everyone?!
I cannot tell you how long things actually took. I felt like it took hours. Hubby says it was about a half hour. My doctors, nurses, the pediatric medical staff and a slew of other people I didn't know came pouring into the room. It felt like a bunch of octopuses (octopi?) because everything was happening so fast. They converted the bed into this weird chair thing and people were EVERYWHERE. Just like that, they told me to grab my legs and start pushing when I felt like I needed to. Well, I couldn't even LIFT my left leg. Poor hubby had to grab it for me.
Push one: nothing. Everyone told me how great I was doing but all I wanted to do was smack them all for taking so long in the first place.
Push two: nothing. I look at Hubby and it was like a mental connection. He moved closer to me and put his other hand on my shoulder and told me he loved me. This simple act gave me a second wind. I was ready to do this now.
Push three: Okay, this was starting to hurt like freaking crazy. Why did everyone tell me all I'd feel was pressure? LIES! Pressure shouldn't hurt this badly.
Push four: EFF THIS. I HATE EVERYONE. GET THIS THING OUT OF ME RIGHT NOW.
Pushes five-fourteen: WHY THE EFF IS THIS TAKING SO LONG? Shouldn't this be over? Is it possible to pass out in labor from pain? If so, that might actually happen.
Push fifteen: Seriously? How long is this going to take? Everyone around me is yelling at the top of their damn lungs that they can see Amelia's head. I mean, that's a good thing, but can't someone just jump in there and pull her out at this point? Why the hell am I still pushing? MAKE THIS STOP.
Push sixteen: She's here! Oh thank Jesus. It's over. My abs must look like a model's at this point.
They hold her up. Oh my goodness. Her head looks like the alien from Alien. I freak out and ask if I broke her. They told me it's completely normal and that it would go away in a matter of hours. I had originally asked for her to be completely cleaned off before anyone put her on me. I completely forgot about that and reached up for her. They put her on my chest and I just stare at her. She's got all the fingers and toes. She's got hair. She's got some lungs on her. But they put her in my arms and she stops crying instantly.
I'm sure lots of stuff happened at this point. I know I got stitches. I know she was weighed and stuff. I know there were pictures and people and monitors and lights and congratulations. But all I remember was her.
I instantly forgot about my dead leg. I forgot about how much pain I was in. I forgot about my shyness of having medical students looking at my lady stuff.
Our hospital has a "room in" policy, so Amelia didn't leave our sight. We held her constantly. This was unlike anything I had imagined. And at this point, all I wanted was food. Mom brought me a salami sandwich and the nurse brought me a Coke. All was right with the world.
Amelia was born at 10:41 am. I can't really remember what happened for the rest of the day. I know we were moved to a post-pardum room. They took out my epidural. The new room felt like a fraction of the space the first room had, but we were bound and determined to try to leave early, so I wasn't going to complain. Meanwhile, outside is one of the worst ice storms NC has seen in years. Power lines are down. Roads are completely iced over. It's a complete mess. But inside our room, we're a happy family.
PS: The midwife insisted I come right up to the bed, because "I would regret it later". I didn't even wanna watch YOU come into the world, and I certainly hadn't planned on a front row seat to Amelia's arrival, but life springs little surprises like that on you. I watched her being born; I heard your cries of pain, and then I heard her cry, and my heart was so full, I wept too. Chad cut the cord, and now the circle goes unbroken - my beautiful daughter now has a beautiful daughter of her own. I love you all so very much!
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